pen to paper

It used to be when I wanted to write I pulled out any number of my partially-used journals and wrote. Some of them were hard-bound with unicorns.  As I became older the journals had falling leaves and profound statements on front.  My favourites were those with parchment paper and circular bindings so they would fall flat onto my lap, as I sat under a tree or in my backyard, somewhere near nature but not quite in it.

Now I have this thing, this business whose scrollbar does not work so I have to have an attached mouse.  And thinking about my parchment and bindings. Parchment from the tree who gives words life. And this, and this, and that, of course. I always think about that.

I often do not feel I belong to the world around me.  I work in a mall, which is a strange, and yet, glorious, place, for a person like me to work.  I watch people, and I can see them puzzled by me, this person who works in a mall but somehow does not seem to care about shoes or clothes, although I wear good ones.

I remember when malls had places where you could buy parchment.  There is one in my mall.  The parchment is already written upon.  There is no room for new words.  There is also a bookseller.  Their current bestseller is by Lady Gaga.  I like her, but I have a feeling I will not read her work.

I want trees.  I want recycled, writable, paper.  I want to see humans without these strange attachments.  We are cyborgs already, we’ve just done it to ourselves.  I remember when I was a kid people would talk about “implanting” humans with technology.  There was no need. All that was needed is a convincing to plug ourselves in.  I want to throw my phone in the sewer whenever I turn it on.  Except the sewer deserves better.

“Turn on, tune in, drop out,” is apt, but not what it was initially designed to mean.  Dropping out is not as easy as releasing the branch of the tree.  It is planting a new tree and waiting for it to grow.  And in the meantime, convincing everyone the new tree will be better.  Also convincing people if they leave their iPhone at home they just might have a better day.

I love my blogging community.  The people I’ve met here are amazing (despite the fact all the time we spend attached to our deVICES).  I feel words are still my tool, my place where I can just sit under trees and exchange ideas with the world.  We have grown greater but smaller and the words push us forward, toward better and brighter things.  Toward reading and learning and hopefully DOING and I love all of you here who are all the better for it.

Yes, this is a rant.  I’ve spent more time in THE WORLD and realized it’s not all it’s cracked up to be.  Strollers are just mini SUVs with Tevo and godknowswhatelse attached to them.

I just want to be with the trees. And the mountains and sea.  And all of you.  For all of you are all of me.


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